I Salute You Stephen A. Smith... And Here's Why...

     For those of you who didn't know, I'm a member of the world's greatest Air Force. I don't speak about my military career in my music, or blogs too often, if at all, because I typically like to keep those two worlds separate. However, with the recent events of ESPN suspending Stephen A. Smith over his remarks of domestic abuse, I felt there was a need for me to open up about an instance of my own that is very similar to the backlash he's receiving. I was never suspended, or in any real trouble, but I did receive tremendous backlash in my situation.
     About a year ago, I attended an annual briefing that we have for Sexual Assault. Usually, this is a really dry briefing, that is aimed at raising awareness to sexual assault, why not to do it, how to respond if it happens to you, and things of that nature. Well, at this particular briefing, there was a scenario being used, where there was a young fella who has a history of trying to make moves on this young lady, and sexually assaulting folks. The young lady knows this about the fella, and had even been sexually assaulted by the fella before herself. So if I remember correctly, there was some sort of party or get together that happened downtown, and these folks are military members, so the lady volunteered to be a designated driver for the other folks, like her coworkers, who may be going out to drink or whatever the case may be. According to the example though, this fella who is known to sexually assault women, and who has sexually assaulted her before, is downtown with everyone else drinking away. The young lady knew he would be there, but she volunteered to go help anyway. The guy gets drunk, she volunteers to take him and a few other friends home. She drops the other two friends off first, then on the way to dropping him off, he sexually assaults her, and actually continues on to rape her. It was a horrible scenario, and I can only hope that it didn't really happen and it was something they made up to get the point across.
     Here's where I come into the picture. While everyone else was snoozing through this briefing, the question was asked, if she was wrong for her actions, or is it her fault for what happened. Whose fault is this matter, basically is the question. Without hesitation, and probably without thinking about it thoroughly, I answered, it's both of their faults. Here's why I said that. The young lady in the scenario could have protected herself, and prevented the rape from happening numerous times throughout the scenario. The first of which is, if she knew he was going to be there, which she did, she SHOULD NOT have volunteered for it. That's one way of making sure, nothing could happen to you. You wouldn't be there. Second, ok, she does go and volunteer anyway. Guy gets drunk, you offer to take him and some others home to be nice. I get that. So, she also could've dropped him off first, while there were other people there to help her, in the event that he tried to do something crazy. These were the things that I tried to present to the discussion. I worded it wrong though, and the room went nuts. There was a female Colonel who argued with me and said I was wrong, and how she doesn't feel safe even leaving the store on base because stuff like this, but clearly, she knew what I really meant. She had to. Nobody could be that silly and think that I'm saying she deserved to be raped in that scenario.
      I'm a married man, and a father of three very beautiful daughters. There's no way in hell, that I would promote raping any woman. No way. However, I do promote doing whatever you can to prevent it from happening. I stand by what I said, and this is advice I will teach my daughters.
     I remember a time when I was 16, Layzie Bone, from Bone Thugs n Harmony, had a concert in Louisville, Kentucky. Some of my friends were going to go, and I planned to go to. My mother on the other hand, feared that there would be shootings and fights happening there, so she said nope, you're not going. I was furious! My friends went, there was nothing violent that happened, and the show was awesome from what I heard. But, what if I disobeyed her and went anyway? What if there was violence that night, just like she said? What if I'm up there having a ball enjoying the concert, and get shot? I was warned of violence being there, I knew Louisville, at least certain areas of the city, was getting bad, what if I just flat out, disobeyed my other and went anyway? Would it be my fault for getting shot? No, it wouldn't be my fault at all, but, I could have prevented it, by listening to my mother and not being there. The same situation applies to the sexual assault scenario. No, she didn't deserve to be raped. Not at all, nobody deserves that, no matter what the situation is. However, if there's anything she could do ahead of time, to prevent being sexually assaulted, she should have done it, to keep herself safe. And in that scenario, not volunteering, at least for that one night, was just the prevention she needed. But if she had to volunteer that particular night, she could've dropped him off first, while there were other people with her in the car, who could have helped. That's all I was saying. I really don't see how that got blown out of proportion.
      With that being said, I salute Stephen A. Smith for his comments, and I agree 100% with what he said. Again, I will teach my three daughters that exact same message, and the exact same message that Whoopi Goldberg said in defense of him. I saw nothing wrong with what was said, and I am ashamed that ESPN felt the need to suspend him for it. I believe the only reason that they did, is because Michelle Beadle called herself outraged, but that's a different discussion all in itself, that I swore I would never discuss on this blog. If you haven't seen or heard what Stephen A. said, here's the link to that: http://youtu.be/IDzWvHhgTrY, as well as the link to Whoopi Goldberg's response: http://youtu.be/9MR0C-AlZl4.
     I know this one was long, and I know some female friends of mine may be outraged, but whatever. Take the time to stop and think about what's being said, instead of actually jumping to conclusions. In both examples here, Stephen A. and myself are trying to look out for you, and protect you from some idiots who don't have any damn home training. Hat's off to Mr. Stephen A. Smith. I'm sure he'll never see this blog, but I salute you good sir. Thanks for reading. Take care.